A Poll of Two: Milton, Melania and More

The political analysis we share here is entirely unfiltered and based on the whims and WTFs of two people who shall remain anonymous. Think of it like you’re overhearing two people in a bar or on a train ... and you want to interrupt. —Various and Sundry

Various:

Sundry: “I have had a bunch of people saying I created and steered the hurricane, there are people assuming we control the weather. I have had to point out that a hurricane has the energy of about 10,000 nuclear bombs and we can’t hope to control that. But it’s taken a turn to more violent rhetoric, especially with people saying those who created Milton should be killed.” The Guardian quoting a poor meteorologist.

The Republicans think there is not global warming…but they spread around crazy shit like what Marjorie Taylor Greene said, that Dems created this hurricane. It’s beyond bananas.

Various: And on one ever says “well God is allowing them to do that.”

Sundry: Now they are after the weathermen!!

Various: Suddenly God is powerless

Sundry: I love that Kamala called the Weather Channel

Various: 10000%

Sundry: That’s all we did when I was in Florida waiting for a Hurricane. Watch that channel.

Various: Kamala is not just leadership but a real understanding of media

Sundry: I loved the press swing she did

Various: Ditto “who’s your Daddy” and the View

Sundry: From Howard Stern. Yes!

Various: Yep

Sundry: To that girl influencer. I forgot her name.

Various: Meanwhile MAGA trolls are saying “it’s unpresidential to be on a podcast that has discussed blowjobs.”

Sundry: !!!!! Because their Candidate is a rapist might get him all worked up

Various: And you counter with ‘but bribing a pornstar you had sex with while your wife was pregnant is ok?’

Sundry: Yes

Various: And they say ‘the left always wants you to bring up old news.’

Sundry: There is no rhyme or reason to their thought process. No straight line to any beliefs.

Various: It’s an alternative reality

Sundry: Be they moral or scientific. Did you see Obama!

Various:

I want to say ‘it’s locker room talk.’ Lol

Sundry: He couldn’t stop laughing. Real laughing not Vance laughing.

Did JD get swept away in Hurricane? I haven’t heard a thing about him since he was nice to Tim Walz.

Various: You mean when Vance’s program code reads ‘let corners of mouth turn up and show 1/2 of them and emit several short exhalations?’

Sundry: Exactly

Various: 1/2 of teeth

Sundry: I was just reading review of Melania book. 200 pages rest is pictures

Various: ‘Book’

Sundry: *laughing crying emojis* She really doesn’t care

Various: Maybe it’ll be in the ‘Trump Presidential Library.’

Sundry: That’s the only library it will be in

Various: With Kid Rock’s autobiographical pamphlet

Sundry: It’s gonna be in the 90-cent bin by Christmas

Various: Ghostwritten by Charlie Kirk. With a foreword by Vivek

Sundry: She claims she didn’t even notice Jan 6 happening

Various: She probably didn’t. The Botox lab had a Michael Buble playlist so she was on the nod

Sundry: Until “mother” pence called asking where her husband was (joking)

Various: I want SNL to recreate the 7 phone calls Trump had with Putin during Biden’s presidency

But seriously, let’s look at Harris’s command of a very slanted media. In a piece today, Matt Gertz of the media watchdog Media Matters reports that five major newspapers—the Los Angeles Times, the New York Times, USA Today, the Wall Street Journal, and the Washington Post—produced nearly four times as many articles about Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton’s email server in 2016 in the week after then-FBI director James Comey announced new developments in the story than they did about the unsealing of a new filing in Trump’s federal criminal indictment for alleged crimes related to the January 6 insurrection earlier this month.

“None of the papers ran even half as many Trump indictment stories as they did on Clinton’s server,” Gertz wrote. “Indeed, every paper ran more front-page stories that mentioned Clinton’s server [than] they did total stories that referenced Trump’s indictment.” The former president continues to benefit from news outlets grading him on a massive curve,” Gertz wrote, “resulting in relatively muted coverage for his nakedly authoritarian, unfathomably racist, and allegedly criminal behavior.”

Sundry: Wait one more thing on Melania. This is a quote from the book:

“Over the next few months, we developed several items: the Fluid Day Serum, the Luxe Night with Vitamins A and E, cleansing balm, and an exfoliating peel, all priced between $50 and $150. In my meetings with chemists, I discovered the rejuvenating properties of caviar.”

Various: NO. YOU ARE JOKING.

Sundry: I AM NOT

Various: NO. Incredible

Sundry: Where are we? What are we doing? We’re trying to launch a retail empire, of course, as a 2011 Melania Trump teams up with a company run by “successful businesspeople” to introduce the American public (the ‘consumer base’) to a “line of high-end skincare products” because, after all, “people frequently asked me about my regimen, marveling at the health of my skin.” Quote from WashPost review.

It is ASTONISHING.

Various: That golden toilet is so clogged it’s amazing any of the turds can still float.

Sundry: And people in red states who just lost everything will vote for this awful woman’s despicable husband. They would both step over the hurricane’s dead

Various: The Post should be just ripping it 2 shreds

Sundry: It is

Various: Ok good

Sundry: and so you see, what she really wanted to do was find a way to “empower women,” and if that means charging you $150 an ounce to put fish eggs on your face, so be it. Ladies, patriotism looks different for everyone.

Various: ‘Joker 2, Megalopolis, and Melania’s Autobiography: A Study of Three Disasters.”

Sundry: By Monica Hesse *laughing crying emojis* God the joker looks bad.

Various: That’s what she did with Putin’s outdated caviar!!!

Vlad was shipping his overstock over and Trump was repackaging it!

Ok

Sundry: That’s the perfect last sentence.